Gay Parenting

A Letter To Our Egg Donor

I’m a father now, and it’s all because of you.

To the woman who changed our lives:

I’m a father now, and it’s all because of you.

It’s because of your existence and your selfless actions that I get to hold two beautiful babies in my arms each morning, and each night get to experience the joy – and sleeplessness – of parenthood. For that, my dear, I am eternally grateful.

The truth is, I never thought that someone like me would get to experience a feeling like this. You knew when you gifted us your eggs that I was gay. And you knew that I wanted to be a father via IVF. What you didn’t know was that I struggled with the thought of going on that journey without you. Every time I closed my eyes and dreamt up a future as a parent, it had you, your eggs, and OUR children in it.

Very few people know who you are by name, but for those people that do, they know how important you have always been in my life. This journey is unique because of that. You are, in fact, much more than a donor. Before and after this experience, you are family. I’ll never be able to repay you for the gift you’ve given us.

Most people don’t know the facts associated with egg donation. Many think it’s easy. Many assume it’s linked with hefty compensation. But there’s much more than meets the eye, especially if you know the intended parents like you do. We want you to know how much we appreciate the psychological leap you took in putting humans into the world that bear your genes, and entrusting them to us.

All we can promise you is that we will never take our twins for granted. They will know of you and what you’ve done from the moment they can communicate. They’ll understand from an early age that they are surrounded by a village that not only helped to make them, but that will forever love and have their best interests in mind. I promise that they will always feel loved and cared for, and that we give them every opportunity in life to the best of our ability.

I can’t pretend to understand how you’re feeling. I can’t know what pushed you to grant us this gift, but I do know this: You’re a saint. At a time when our world seems filled with negativity and evil, you’re an example of all that is good. No matter what happens to you in this lifetime, you should always know that you are, at your core, someone who has made the universe a better place.

So thank you, my precious egg donor. Thank you for your love and support, thank you for this gift, thank you for existing, and for reminding us how good this world – and the people in it – can be.

All my love,

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9 comments on “A Letter To Our Egg Donor

  1. Beautiful, Sean. I’m sure this is greatly appreciated. Can’t wait to see you again, and am so excited to see Stella and Cooper!

    Liked by 2 people

  2. Allison Lellos

    This is absolute perfection. So beautifully written and so full of love. Congratulations to you and your incredible family ❤️

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Your hearts are full. Your words express this to the world. Your gratitude is loving and kind. You are already amazing parents. And I am certain, this courageous, generous, open woman….. knew you would be incredible parents a very long time ago. I believe this is what makes all three of you such fantastic definitions to the rest of the world of the words LOVE & FAMILY.

    Liked by 2 people

  4. Ofe Dudley-Polack

    Very nicely said Sean! We are blessed with a supportive family, your egg donor, has shown her love for you in the most unbelievable way there is. The Lord will reward her with a life filled with blessings, the first one, is the happiness she has given you with the birth of the twins, but this is just the beginning for her….God bless you all! I’m bursting with price and joy! Abuela

    Liked by 2 people

  5. I just found you guys by chance, but i cant believe how cute you all are! Your writing is so cheeky and makes my day, this letter was beautiful. My aunts have 2 children by a doner. Goddess bless selfless people like them, and the good people who raise these beauties, like you. – kristy nicole

    Liked by 1 person

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