Will I Tell You My Baby Names? Absolutely Not.

Yes, we’ve decided what we’ll be naming our twins.

No, we won’t tell you.

And here’s 15 reasons why you shouldn’t tell people your baby name(s) before the birth either:

1. They’ll tell you that the name reminds them of someone from their past who was a [insert nasty word that you would never want to hear in relation to your unborn child].

2. You’ll quickly learn that you’re not as creative as you think, and that nearly every person within a 10-mile radius knows 2-3 people with the very same “unique” name.

3. You’ll be forced to sit through a post-conversation wondering if they actually like the name or just faked that “it’s the very best one” they’ve ever heard.

4. You’ll share your final two options and a competition will emerge, with mothers and baristas alike aggressively campaigning for their favorite.

5. You’ll quickly learn that your best friend, your co-worker and the waitress at IHOP (yes, I’m an over-sharer) have the very same baby name in mind.

6. You’ll get to sit through numerous people guessing. And honestly, there’s nothing more fun than seeing a friend get mad about not knowing a secret.

7. You’ll change your mind at the very last minute and someone will have already gotten you a monogrammed infant beanie.

8. You won’t change your mind at the very last minute but someone will have gotten you a monogrammed infant beanie. 😉

9. Someone might accidentally spoil the surprise to the baby’s namesake.

10. If you’re superstitious, you’re tempting fate. And that’s a total sin in the pregnancy bible.

11. You won’t be able to change it because you already told 215 of your closest friends and don’t want to come across like a crazy person.

12. You’ll receive pressure by your father to keep a family tradition going, even if you hate your middle name and think the silly little “Jr.” at the end disrupts your cursive flow.

13. A random acquaintance who has their baby first snags the name. Yes, it’s happened. No, I can’t verify it. Yes, I trust everything I read on Facebook.

14. If someone doesn’t like the name, they have a few months to attempt to persuade you to change it. And that will be horribly annoying and likely destroy your friendship.

15. It’s fun to keep a secret. Try it just this once. I swear you’ll like how it feels.

Did you share your baby’s name before birth? If so, how many of these happened to you? Did I miss any?

P.s. I’ve done six of the above myself, so don’t feel bad about doing them.

Until next time, stay crafty.